John Sellens' Home Page


New! I have THREE great accomplishments that I'm inordinately proud of.
SYONEX I am the proprietor of SYONEX offering expertise in systems and networks, and products for organizations of all sizes.
Gears I am no longer a small cog in a big corporate wheel.
Certainty I was the General Manager of Certainty Solutions in Canada. Certainty Solutions was an Internet Managed Services Provider, headquartered in Redwood City, California.
UUNET Canada I was Director, Network Engineering at UUNET Canada, one of the UUNET Global companies, until I resigned in June 1999 to pursue other opportunities :-).
University of Waterloo I'm proud to be an alumnus and former staff member of the University of Waterloo, most recently in Information Systems and Technology. Some people asked me why I left UW. I'm also an MFCF alumnus.


I have written some things and presented some papers from time to time, and I have some of them available online.

Thresh is a data-directed SNMP threshold poller, written in Tcl with the Scotty toolkit.

I have a small collection of references to Problem Tracking systems.

I have another small collection of references to SNMP Related Links -- SNMP is of course the Simple Network Management Protocol.

I've got some other stuff available too.


Here are some things that I am (or have been) involved in:
FASS - The FASS Theatre Company
Information about UW's FASS Theatre Company, entertaining people for over forty years
KWLT - Kitchener-Waterloo Little Theatre
Information about Kitchener-Waterloo Little Theatre, K-W's non-profit, all-volunteer, community theatre group, active since 1935. I have a number of KWLT Newsletters online.
Markham Concert Band
Information about the Markham Concert Band, formed in 1978, and with over 65 members, it is one of the largest community bands in Canada! Band members include young and old from many fields of endeavour.
MLT - Markham Little Theatre
Information about Markham Little Theatre, Markham's non-profit, all-volunteer, community theatre group, active since 1966. If you get confused between Markham Little Theatre and the Markham Theatre, check out the Markham Theatre web site.
Information about USENIX
USENIX is the UNIX and Advanced Computing Systems Professional and Technical Association. I was UW's liaison for the USENIX Association's University Outreach program. Student grants are available for students wishing to attend USENIX conferences -- ask Robyn Landers for details, or check out the USENIX Student Programs web page.
The USENIX Association             SAGE, The System Administrators' Guild
Roland Sampler Users Group
I maintain a mailing list and FTP archive for users of Roland samplers, known as the sgroup.


I've got too many, so now they're in a separate quotes page.

Nonsense of Various Kinds

How You Sleep Is Who You Are
I am not a morning person, I am an evening person. Research suggests that evening people are much more interesting than morning people.
Are You Above Average?
If so, research proves that you actually might just be incompetent.
( DunningKruger effect)
Search Engines Never Lie
In late 1999, early 2000 (i.e. in the deep, dark, past) if you asked Google for things that were more+evil+than+satan+himself, and you would have seen the true answer. (It's not nearly so effective anymore.)

I am a Geek

Proof that I am a Geek, including PGP keys and so on.

Propaganda and Overhead

Look! Logos!

Best Viewed With Any Browser         [EFC Golden Key - Strong Crypto]

Valid CSS!         Valid HTML 4.0!         Linklint

I use lots of freely available software every day. Most of my computers run FreeBSD, and I use fetchmail to retrieve an average of more than 1,500(!) mail messages a day. (I'm on a lot of mailing lists.) And I use the really cool Website META Language to generate (virtually) all my web pages. Excellent stuff.

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General Concepts: Yesterday's Solutions to Tomorrow's Problems
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2020-04-18 17:43:20 --- 2020-08-08 17:36:55
LISA '13

John Sellens is teaching "Nagios: Advanced Topics" at the 2013 USENIX LISA System Administration Conference in Washington, DC, November 3-8.

LISA '13
(The Preceding is Free Volunteer Advertising for Worthy Causes)